How to get past comparison
Does this scenario sound familiar? You start working on a project and get into a flow. Maybe you’re doing research or looking for inspiration on Instagram. Then you come across someone in your industry, and they’re way ahead of you
You think, “wow their work is so much better than mine.”
“How did they get so many followers?”
“I wish I could be doing what they’re doing”
Suddenly you don’t feel like continuing. Instead, you spend more time thinking about why you’re not doing X and don’t have Y.
The good news is, this is normal. Every creative on the face of this planet has been discouraged after comparing themselves. Even the artists you admire the most.
The key to getting past comparison is to accept it, but not let it disrupt your progress. Below are 5 things to remember if you get into the cycle of comparison.
You’re not alone
Its worth repeating here that this isn’t something you’re experiencing in isolation. Think of the person’s work you’re looking at and realize they also compared themselves to someone. But they didn’t let it stop them from moving forward.
Use comparison as fuel
If you’re feeling discouraged because you’re not there yet, flip that narrative to a positive perspective. You’re not there yet, but you’re on your way. What can you start doing now to help you achieve your next milestone?
Maybe reach out the creative you’re comparing yourself to and ask to get coffee or chat for 10-15 minutes. There’s a lot we can learn from those ahead of us, and they could even turn into a mentor.
Use their level of work as inspiration to elevate what you’re working on. You can also engage with their followers to help build your audience.
Make a plan and stick to it
Decide what you’re going to do and start doing it. This is easier said than done, because of emotional hurdles we need to jump through to start. One of those hurdles is comparison.
Let the “I’m not good enough” and “What if I fail” thoughts pass by. Accept them and then go create anyway. As cliché as it is, you will never know unless you try.
Practical advice is to give yourself a deadline for your next milestone. Decide an amount of time you’d like to work on your goal, and when you want to complete it by.
Be generous with your time and realize that tasks almost always take longer than we imagine. Be flexible when a day or week doesn’t go exactly to plan. Remember this next step.
You’re in control
You’re in the driver’s seat of your life and the decisions you choose to make. While this is very empowering it also gives you a lot of responsibility.
If you don’t do something, it’s because you chose not to. You can use as many excuses as you want, but at the end of the day, it is your choice. No one else is responsible to get you where you want to be. But that doesn’t mean you have to do it alone.
Leverage your community
Some of the most discouraging thoughts that come from comparison are the ones that make us feel like our goals are too large or impossible. It’s very easy to think that we have to achieve big goals alone. When we try to go solo without asking for help, it makes the process more difficult.
You’d be surprised how many of your friends and colleagues are open to helping you. The people who care about you want to succeed.
By asking others for help, you’ll also learn how to be a team player. Nobody wants to be the person always asking for favors but never returning them. This is a great opportunity to think about your strengths and what you can offer the people in your life.
What can result is a genuine circle of support. It’s a great feeling when you and your colleagues can see each other grow and succeed together.
You’ve got this
Sometimes the best work starts with comparison. On the surface, it seems like there are so many people doing better than you. The reality is, everyone started somewhere.
Remember that you are in the driver’s seat and get to decide your life choices. There are people who care about you that can help you along the way. Make a plan, stick to it, and enjoy the process. The more deliberate and intentional you are, the faster you will see results.
If you do feel like having a community of other like-minded creatives around you would be beneficial, Love Wavelength is here for you. We are a community of ambitious creatives doing what we love and growing together.
Alexia Adana
Alexia is a creative director and photographer based in NYC. She writes about growth, creative inspiration, and how to do what you love.
